23 weeks

Bean and I are 23w1d today and have a 118 days to go! I am feeling a TON of movement now, which I seriously love. I am having to relearn how to sleep now because I am so used to sleeping on my stomach, which is not an option anymore, it hurts waaaay to much. I need to call and schedule our next check-up and follow up ultrasound! I can't wait to see his little face this time, he is already so big. His daddy and I were talking last night and its hard to think about how different our lives are now. I told him I felt sort of guilty when I got pregnant because it changes a lot of things, more so for him than for me. For me, the only change is now I have to take a year off school and work part time and take care of Bean. For him, it means keeping his job at Wal-Mart another two years or so and finishing school over the next 2-3 years. He's already been in school for 5 years. In all fairness, if he had committed to school more over the past 5 years he would be done now, but then he wouldn't have the job he has and we wouldn't be in the house we're in. On the other hand, he could be in an engineering job at the moment too. Or unemployed. Who knows? He keeps quoting this line from Kung Fu Panda to me "The past is history. The future a mystery. But today is a gift, that's why its called the present." Haha. Sorta cheesy  but true. I need to learn to relax more and focus on living our life to the best of our ability. I love my husband and unborn Bean, and when its all said and done it doesnt matter if every night I cook the healthiest dinner or have the cleanest house. What matters is if we take time for each other everyday and enjoy each other's company and if our son sees parents who love each other and love him. I dont want to raise him in a household with power parents who make 6 figures a year and never see him or spend time with him. On the other hand, I dont want to put us in a situation where we can't afford to buy him shoes for school or sign him up for football because we are broke. Its a fine balance. I have a unusual drive to be successful, and to work all the time and constantly improve our life. Its time to relax and enjoy this pregnancy. Its time to enjoy this pregnancy and spend time reflecting on the kind of parents we want to be. Its time to be excited and anticipate this little life we've created. Its NOT time to pack every moment of everyday with stuff to do and goals that must be achieved. Sigh. Ok, enough ranting and raving. I will keep this updated after our apt. next week.

almost 22 weeks...and its a...

I have been feeling Bean move more and more. I love it! School has been going well, just really busy. Its not hard, just really time consuming. I enjoy learning about all the ways to reach little minds. We had our 20 week ultra sound this last week, and for those who don't know (which is pretty much everyone at this point) its a BOY! We're having a son, a boy bean! I have to admit, I was sorta shocked and slightly upset at first. That lasted an hour or so, and now I can't imagine having anything else. Geoff had a good point, we need more boys. Theres him, and my brother on either side of the family and thats it! I think it would be sorta sweet to have the first grandson, but we'll see. It'd be fun for Bean if Chels is having a boy too, then he'd have a buddy his age. I spent a lot of this past weekend checking out nursery decor. We considered a lot of options, including frogs, rockets, yellow and blue, chocolate and blue, etc. We decided on an adorable plaid quilt in primary colors and primary colored boy themed crib sheets and decor. We're thinking trucks, rockets, animals, Dr. Seuss, etc. I think it'll be great. I think we're gonna paint his room a soft, warmish blue with a light cloud pattern to it, and do airplanes and rockets and trucks etc on the walls in the form of wall hangings. My mom is gonna make the quilt, and some receiving blankets. I can't wait to see how it all goes down. We need to get the room set up and cleaned up soon so we can get started on the nursery part! I can't wait. Everyone seems really excited to be having a boy, and I can't wait to meet this amazing little person in my belly :o) We have to go back for another ultrasound because Bean wouldn't co-operate and they need to see his face. I dont mind, more pictures for me!